"Go early. Go Positive."
This was a comment I heard recently on a podcast that I really liked. The podcast was about human interaction and how we are all afraid to break the ice. Their suggestion was to go early. Be the person who says hello. Go Positive, say something nice about the person.
As a theory, it sounds very simple. Make it about them. If you are nervous about saying something they probably are too. Be generous with your praise. It's something I was going to add to my day to day life. Say hello to more people, say something kind to them, until covid had others plans.
Tall Poppy is a nightmare
We all know that NZ has an issue with Tall Poppy Syndrome. As a kid, I was made to feel bad because I was better at a game than some of the other kids. I don't think that is a positive trait our country has.
I got told by people not to try to make the NBA when I was younger. It took me years to work out that they weren't saying it to to protect my feelings if I didn't make it. They were saying it to protect their feelings if I did make it. They made my effort about them.
Recently, while watching the Olympics, one of our athletes won a gold medal. The first thing out of the reporter's mouth was how humble they are. Not how much hard work, the drive, determination, sacrifice, skill, commitment, you name it. None of that stuff. The reporter made it about themselves by saying the person was humble i.e the reporter made it about how they feel not about the person who won.
Life isn't a zero-sum game. Your success doesn't limit my success. On the contrary, your success breeds success. Tell people how great they are. How good they look. How well they have done.
Go Early. Be the bigger person and make it about them. Be the first person to talk. Start the tone of the conversation.
Go Positive. Rejoicing in someone's success doesn't diminish yours. Add some light to someone's day, see how their smile makes you smile.
Don't lie to people and tell them they are great when they are not, but reward their effort, their ambition.
Be the change
We have tall poppy here because we act in a way that makes it socially acceptable and normal and in general, people follow the norm.
So we can change it. I know I feel weird when I get complimented because we don't do that often in NZ. That is another barrier to this. Again, we control that. We can make it normal.
Go Early. Go Positive.
Moment of Gratitude
I am pleased that the rest of the country is back to level 2. It is a bit rough up in Auckland and I am looking forward to some take away's. However, I am happy that my friends and family elsewhere get to see each other.
We will get there soon, we just have to wait a little longer. Living in a big city has its positives, but also its negatives, this is one of them.
The lockdown is less ideal but it's meant I have saved more money than I would normally and I have read more books.
Shave well, Be Awesome, Go Early, Go Positive.